Question
I’m neg, my gf is pos: she doesn’t know I know…
7 July 2016. Related: South Africa, Support.
My girlfriend has HIV. And I am negative, and she doesn’t know I know. Sex between us is incredibly awkward. Is there anything I can do to make things better?
Answer
Hi
Thanks – your situation may be more common than you think. It is great that you are so supportve – and also that you are smart enough to understand that you need not be at any risk.
Every couple will be different. You know yor partner best and how she responds to things.
Telling someone you are postivie and we get lots of questions for people who want to say but find it very difficult.
Please try different things but talking is key. Perhaps talk about HIV in general when it is in the news. Or talk about a friend you knwo hwo is positive – which gives you the chance to show you are fine. Of say you once wentout with someone who was positive etc.
If none of this works, and this is blocking your relationship, you can also be honest and just say you know. Be careful in how you do this.
Some people are very protective or their personal health information – so you might initially get a bad reaction – but in the end this might be the only way to move forward.
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