Question
My HIV+ girlfriend wants to get pregnant but I am scared…
29 December 2020. Related: All topics, HIV transmission, Pregnancy.
Hi, my girlfriend is HIV positive and I’m HIV negative. She want to be pregnant while I’m scared to have sex without a condom. What will i do?
Answer
Hi
Thanks for your question.
Does your girlfriend have an undetectable viral load because she is taking HIV treatment?
If yes, then it is easy to conceive naturally without any risk to you. This is because HIV treatment will also protect you by making viral load too low to be a risk.
This is called U=U (undetectable=untransmittable) and there is more info here:
https://i-base.info/u-equals-u-qa
If you are still worried, you could still use a condom until you are ready to ejaculate and then take the condom off right at the end. Make sure this isn’t a condom that contains spermicide though. Or you could get yourself close without using a condom so that the time you have sex is very short.
This is also something that your doctor can help with – to help decide the best times to try to conceive.
But really, U=U will make any risk zero, so perhaps ready more about this might be the nicest way to think about starting a family.
This guide has much more info on pregnancy, including on conceiving when one of you is negative:
https://i-base.info/guides/pregnancy
Hi Ayandiswa, thanks. Yes <20 (less than 20) means your viral load is undetectable. As well as showing your meds are working well for you, this also stops the risk of HIV transmission.
This means that is is safe to have sex without using condoms.
Sex without condoms withan undetectable viral load is "safe sex".
My viral load is <20, am I undetectable? Is it safe to practice unsafe sex