Question
I have HIV, a doctor says we can’t have children. Is this true?
6 May 2016. Related: All topics, Children, Pregnancy, Sero different couples.
I am a HIV positive man and my partner is negative. When we met a doctor he said it is not possible to have a child without infection and also that this is risky for my partner. We want a child, please help us.
Answer
Hi,
This doctor is giving you bad information. Many couples like yours, with a positive and a negative partner safely have HIV negative children.
This is almost always now done using treatment. After a few months you being on HIV treatment protects your partner. Because of this she will not get HIV and because of that any child will also be HIV negative.
It is a good idea to look for a doctor who knows more about HIV and having children.
We have a post on our website with information about HIV positive men having children.
Hi Tierra,
There’s no reason at all why you can’t have kids. HIV shouldn’t be a barrier. For more info, please see Q6 here:
https://i-base.info/qa/what-are-the-most-asked-questions
Both my partner and I are positive, can we have kids?
Thanks Thulani, but neither PrEP nor PEP are needed if the positive partner has an undetectable viral load on ART.
I think I understand the risk this doctor is talking about. There’s something called PREP and PEP. This is very important for one partner being negative. Your negative partner should take PREP while you continue with treatment.
If you are HIV negative you need to be careful to reduce the risk of getting HIV from your partner. Many couples use condoms, which are effective and protect against HIV. The risk to you is dramatically reduced if your partner is on treatment with a viral load that is under 50. Some clinics offer PrEP for people who think they are at risk of HIV. Taking PrEP also protects against HIV. It means having to take some of the drugs used to treat HIV.
How can I get treatment if my partner is HIV positive and I’m negative
Hi,
Any changes in treatment should make sure that your viral load stays below 50. Drug resistance can develop if a drug is stopped. It is important that you are on three effective medications. You can ask your clinic for new meds if they can’t supply Aluvia.
Hi, I’m confused and stressed and need help. I’m taking Aluvia, and tenofovir and lamivudine. But suddenly this month when I went to collect my meds at the clinic they only gave me tenofovir and lamivudine. They told me they don’t have Alluvia. My question is would I develop drug resistance?
Hi,
I’m so sorry to hear that you’re angry and confused. HIV is not easy to get, so even if your partner is positive you might not be. But it’s important to get checked. You could ask at the clinic for support when you have the test done. Even if you do test positive many people with HIV can expect to live as long as people who don’t have HIV.
I’m scared to have an HIV test because I think my partner infected me purposely. He didn’t want to use a condom. I’m confused and angry at the same time because I have a two year old daughter. Please help