Q and A

Question

Can I have sex with someone who is positive and not catch HIV?

16 January 2018. Related: All topics, HIV transmission.

Answer

Answer: Simon Collins

Yes, there are lots of ways to make sure HIV is not transmitted during sex.

  1. One of the easiest and most effective ways is just for the HIV positive partner to be on treatment. An undetectable viral load makes HIV untransmittable. (See: The evidence for U=U).
  2. Another relatively recent option is for the negative partner to use PrEP. This is an oral drug that when taken as prescribed is highly effective. (See: UK guide to PrEP).
  3. You can use condoms which are an effective barrier against HIV (and other STIs). Condoms need to be used carefully, preferably with plenty of lube. (See: How to use a condom (male and female).

HIV is a much less infectious virus than many other sexually transmitted infections (STI’s).

Even without a condom, the risk from a single exposure is less than, for example, 1 in 300. The actual risk becoming infected varies depending on many factors. These include the type of exposure, whether the other person is HIV positive, how high or low their viral load is, the duration and roughness of the sex etc.

If the partner is HIV positive, then viral load is the most important factor. The PARTNER study reported zero HIV transmissions after 900 couples had sex more than 58,000 times WITHOUT condoms. In this study undetectable viral load was defined as being less than 200 copies/mL.
https://i-base.info/qa-on-the-partner-study

Risk factors for penetrative sex without a condom with someone who has a very high viral load could be as high as 1 in 10 (10% risk). But the risk is effectively zero with someone who is taking treatment and who has an undetectable viral load.

This question was updated in January 2018 and November 2016 from an original answer posted in June 2007. i-Base no longer answers individual questions about HIV transmission and risk. (See: Question 1 at this link).

209 comments

  1. Simon Collins •

    Please read the original post and other discussions for this question.

    For one time, there is a very good chance that you are still negative – for example, your partner might not have been positive – or they might have been on treatment.

    You can only find this out by taking an HIV test – usually in about 4 weeks. Far more people have sex without a condom every night without becoming positive. This should help you worry less until you are able to test.

  2. Bianca •

    I have sex with someone with hiv the condoms pulse inside I so scared help me please

  3. Simon Collins •

    Hi Prosper

    Any symptom should be something to talk to your doctor about. i-Base are not doctors and we cannot diagnose symptoms.

  4. PROSPER... •

    Please am having stomach problems for days now, not only that weakness, headeche and inner body hotness.. Could this be symptom of HIV…?

  5. Simon Collins •

    Hi Matthew

    Transmission questions are already answer in the FAQ page:
    http://i-base.info/qa/factsheets/hiv-transmission-and-testing

    Or in this online guide:
    HIV testing and risk of transmission

  6. Matthew •

    Hi

    I slept with a girl who has slept with someone she thinks may have HIV, I slept with her once ……what would you say the likely hood is of catching HIV, does HIV get transferred throughout sex without fail or is it luck of the draw?

  7. toni •

    Hi, I had only 1 time blow job with my friend and he finished in my mouth and he just said he’s HIV negative. I didn’t swallow and also washed my mouth straight away many times. I am really worried because I got OCD. is it possible from that way. thanks

  8. Simon Collins •

    Hi Toni

    The risk of catching HIV from oral sex is very very low.

    If you friend is HIV negative then the risk is zero.

  9. Simon Collins •

    Hi Femi

    The only way to know your HIV status is to take the test. This is a good thing to do.

    Your wife is right to say this and maybe this is something that both of you should do.

    The results are more likely to be negative than positive. If either of you is HIV positive though, treatment is very effective and you can still get married and have a family – but this way you will both be protecting each other first.

  10. femi •

    how can i know my status with out doing the test? i am afraid of doing the test because i made love with some girls with out condom. pls help me. i need to know because my wife says that i must do the test before we can get married.