Question

How do I tell my boyfriend I am HIV positive?

14 July 2023. Related: Adherence, All topics, Disclosure.

Hi, I’m scared to tell my boyfriend that I’m taking ART because I don’t want to lose him. I stopped going to the clinic to take my meds and it’s been 4months now. We are leaving together. I don’t want him to find out because I told my previous boyfriend that I’m HIV positive and then he left me. What can I do?

Answer

Answer: Josh Peasegood

Hi, how are you doing?

I am sorry to hear what happened with your previous boyfriend. Do you know how your current boyfriend feels about HIV?

And can I just ask does this mean that you have not been taking meds for the last 4 months? and if so have you been using a condom with your boyfriend?

Telling a partner can be difficult, especially in your case as it has already gone poorly in the past. If you can talk around the subject before telling him to find out how he feels you may be able to get an idea about how he will react.

What is most important is that you feel safe and comfortable to do this, if this is something you want to do. It can help having a friend or family member with you who knows about your status to help answer questions.

Please see here for our disclosure Q&A.

Josh.