Q and A

Question

Are there websites to meet other HIV positive people?

I am an HIV positive heterosexual British woman. I had chosen the single life since my diagnosis five years ago. But now I feel ready to start dating again and would love to find a partner that I can maybe share a future with. I refuse to sit on the shelf anymore and give in to a solitary future because of my HIV!

Unfortunately, I have not had very good reactions when I have disclosed my HIV status and have been the victim of ignorant gossip as a result. So I was wondering, are there any free dating sites for people living with HIV in the UK?

Answer

It is good that you want to start dating again. The shock from an HIV diagnosis often makes people want to wait before dating again. Sometimes it takes time to build up the strength and confidence to want to do this.

Deciding to meet other positive people has a lot of advantages and one of the easiest ways to make contact with people is to use the internet.

The community forums at poz.com include a personals section that has free registration and many thousands of international users (including from the UK). This might be a good place to start.

You do not have to live alone just because of your HIV status. There are many people in a similar situation just like you, but they have managed to find someone that they can share and enjoy their lives with. This is a very encouraging and a positive step that you have made towards your future.

Community-based sites are likely to be better that commercial sites that require fees. Most community sites though include options to access more feature by subscribing.

If the forums here are not helpful, you could start a discussion to see whether other members have found other sites helpful.

There are lots of online resources about internet dating that talk about how to do this safely. This includes taking care when giving out personal information and if you get to the point of wanting to meet, to do this in a public place, with a friend knowing your plans.

The check list at this link is a good overview if you are new to meeting people by internet.

130 comments

  1. JORDANA

    Meeting new individuals with the same faith is a very difficult task indeed… I wish everyone searching for love, to make a life and have a family with some one the very best in there search for happiness and companionship… Yes it may seem that there is no hope at times causes us to retreat with a mind set of being selobet for the remainder or our exsistance on this planet … The fears does not help the situation, the what if’s and so on and so forth… Just try to remain positive and positive out comes I believe will envelop you all, you will find that one person that is ment for you … That you truely can relate too … Universe activate!!! For and on all of our behaves… Love should never be with held no matter one’s faith denominations or creed ❤ …

  2. Josh Peasegood

    Hi Justine, I am sorry to hear you have not had success with any dating sites. Is there an HIV support group near where you live that can help you connect with others in a similar situation as to yourself? Or if this isn’t available have you tried any dating sites/apps where you can share your status? Good luck with the dating.

  3. Justine

    Hello there am Justine from Uganda
    Have been positive for 4yrs
    Am looking for a serious relationship
    Have tried many dating sites but all in vains
    Am 25yrs

  4. Josh Peasegood

    Hi Flo, why have you been having trouble? Joining an app will not ensure hookups.

  5. FLO M

    I have tried to join Apps for positives for hookup not succeeding.Any help plz

  6. Josh Peasegood

    Hi Bipul, if you have a question you can ask anonymously using our Q&A page. This is a link that will explain how to ask https://i-base.info/questions/ We also have a phone service if you prefer open between 12-4 Monday – Wednesday.

  7. Bipul

    Hi , I am Bipul from Assam,guwahati, India…I am 25 year old age…today im also positive …please contact me 8638540988 its my whatsapp no…any one positive girls…I want marry any countries girls

  8. Simon Collins

    Hi Dan, thanks. Different viral load tests have different sensitivity cut-off levels. Anything below this level is undetectable.

    The most common tests have cut-offs of 200, 50, 40 or 20 copies/mL. HIV is not transmittable sexually so long as viral load is less than 200 copies/mL. It is easy to ask your doctor or lab which test they use.

    US laws that criminalise sex are complicated and vary between States. Their use to criminalise HIV is oppressive but is slowly being challenged due to U=U.

    Two excellent organisations working on this are the SERO project in the US (https://www.seroproject.com) and the HIV Justice Network globally (https://www.hivjustice.net).

  9. dan

    My tests show my HIV is so low that a number cannot be applied to it. Does this mean I am undetectable and untransmittable ? I take my pills every day but I still fear I may be blamed if someone claims I gave them HIV. In Minnesota I would go to jail if convicted.

  10. Simon Collins

    Hi there – if you are taking HIV treatment and have an undetectable viral load, then there is no risk to your partner, even if you do not use condoms. Please see this link to read more about U=U:
    https://i-base.info/u-equals-u

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