Question
I’m HIV negative and my husband’s positive. Can we have a baby?
31 May 2012. Related: All topics, Newly diagnosed, Pregnancy, Sero different couples.
I just found out last year that my husband is HIV positive.
I have done two tests and both of them came out negative. The last one was an ELISA test.
We would like to have one more child. His CD4 count taken earlier this month is 600. He is not on treatment. My CD4 count is 1400. I took it just to be sure.
How is it possible for me to remain negative?
Can we have a child?
Please help.
Answer
Firstly, I am sorry about your husband’s recent diagnosis. It is good that you are supporting him and planning to have a second baby in the future.
Many sero-different couples (where one is HIV positive and the other is not), have had and continue to have healthy HIV negative babies.
There are a number of conception options available for couples like you. These are dependant on a number of factors including whether your partner is on treatment or not and what his viral load is. For more information on these options, please follow this link to our guide to HIV, pregnancy and women’s health.
You may also find it helpful to follow this link to the Swiss statement which explains in more detail, conditions that need to be present, should you choose to go for the option of TUI (Timed Unprotect Intercourse) as explained in the guide above.
In response to your second question, it is possible for you to test HIV negative whilst your husband tests HIV positive. This is not uncommon and there are many couples in your situation.
The risk of catching HIV relates to many things, including your partner’s viral load (ie how infections he or she is). Not every exposure results in HIV being passed on. And you may also have just been lucky so far.
It doesn’t mean that you are protected as you could still be at risk of getting HIV later on.
This risk is dramatically reduced when the positive partner is taking ARVs and has an undetectable viral load. Viral load refers to the amount of virus in your body. Having undetectable viral load means having very little virus therefore the risk of transmission.
For more information on risks of transmission, please follow this link to our guide to HIV testing and risks of transmission. The guide also explains your situation in more detail.
Good luck with your future plans.
Hi San,
Are you taking ARVs and is your viral load undetectable? Once you are stable on treatment and undetectable your boyfriend is be protected from HIV. Please read more here about Undetectable = Untransmittable (U=U).
However, if you are worried, you can talk to the clinic about PrEP. This is also an effective way of protecting your boyfriend from HIV.
It’s great to hear that you want to have a baby. Please see this guide to HIV, pregnancy and women’s health.
Hi i’m HIV positive and my boyfriend is negative i’ve been on ART since 2015 we want to conceive is there any medication he can take just to make sure he doesn’t get infected.
Good Day Joy,
That sounds great. The good news is that people are now talking about the U=U campaign. Undetectable = untransmittable. So if your husband is on ARVs and undetectable for several months (called stable on ART) there is zero risk of HIV transmission. There’s more info here about U=U. Here’s a link to the i-Base guide to HIV pregnancy and women’s health. You can both talk to your husband’s doctor about wanting babies and get some tips on becoming pregnant at the right time. Best wishes.
good day. my husband tested positive while am negative…pls i want to know if we can have sex at anytime…(though he is on ARVs) cos we wanna have babies
Hi Eunice,
There’s no reason why as a positive woman you can’t have a sex life. Loads of positive women have active fulfilling sex lives. If you’re on medication and have an undetectable viral load you can even have sex without a condom. This is because when someone is on medication and undetectable they cannot transmit HIV. Please see here for more info:
http://i-base.info/htb/32308
If your husband is thinking about leaving you, then maybe having children with him isn’t the right thing to do. Also, if he’s thinking about leaving you because you’re positive, is this really the sort of person you want to spend your life with. You’re a positive woman who doesn’t deserve to be stigmatised.
I’m HIV positive and I’m taking arv and my husband HIV negative, we want to have a baby but not by sexual intercourse, is that possible? And now he want to leave me because we can’t have sex life
Hi Lebogang, It’s great that you’re thinking of having a baby. If your husband is on HIV treatment (ART) and he has undetectable viral load, this can protect you, and your baby, from HIV. Here is the i-Base guide to HIV, pregnancy and women’s health. You can talk to your husband’s doctor and make safe plans for you and your baby.
Hy am HIV NEGATIVE AND MY HUSBAND HIS HIV POSITIVE AND WE WANT A BABY SO WHAT CAN WE DO SO THAT I CANNOT BE INFECTED
Hi Darlington,
Unless your viral load is undetectable you will be putting your girlfriend at risk if you have sex without a condom. And his includes if you don’t ejaculate inside her.
I am HIV positive and I want to have sex without condoms with my girlfriend who is HIV negative. I want to know if she would be infected if I don’t ejaculate inside her?