Question
Why did my mom remain uninfected by my postive dad?
3 January 2012. Related: All topics, HIV transmission.
My dad tested positive in 2005 and didnt tell my mom. In 2006 my mom gave birth to a baby boy who was conceived after my dad’s test. They stayed together until my mom found out last year when my dad got seriously ill and passed away. Since then my mom has done more than 6 HIV tests and they are all negetive. I want to know how this possible?
Answer
I’m sorry to hear about your Dad and hope that you have had support to learn about HIV and to cope with his illness.
HIV is not always transmitted, even when your partner is HIV positive and you do not use a condom. So your Mum can trust the test results and move on with her life. It is still important to use condoms with future partners though. In this she has just been lucky.
Please take a look at this link for more information on transmission.
Hi Nicole,
I’m sorry to hear that you are obviously very worried. It is understandable to be afraid but if your partner is undetectable you are very unlikely to have been infected. HIV is not a very easy virus to catch and having an undetectable viral load reduces the chance of infection by up to 96%. The Swiss statement issued in January 2008 described the risk of being infected by somebody who is on stable ARV treatment as being ‘negligible’.
It sounds like you could benefit from getting some support. There are many couples who are in a similar situation to you, where one partner is negative and the other positive. This is called being ‘sero-discordant’. Your husband’s HIV clinic should be able to give you advice on where you can receive support in order to allow you to feel more at ease with your situation. You might also find it interesting to read our guide to HIV testing and sexual transmission which explains the risks and should help you feel more confident in your situation.
In August of last year I found out my boyfriend was HIV positive, we had been together for 2 years and I did not know. I found out because I found his pills when I confronted him he denied it. Finally he came clean and the next day I was tested the results were negative. We have continued our relationship but it hasn’t been easy for me because I keep battling with myself if I am doing the right thing by staying in a relationship with him. It is so confusing because I met him after I left my husband who was abuse and wasn’t taking care of me and my children. Meeting him was like a blessing because he was the man I dreamed of and the father my kids prayed for. Recently we had sex and the condom broke and I am so scared. I am scared because I know if the test comes back positive I am not going to take it well. I know he had a doctor appointment recently and he is still testing undetectable and taking his meds but I am so scared
As your recent test was negative this means that there is still a good chance that you may still be lucky. HIV is not an easy virus to catch sexually. In terms of risk and probability, even if your partner is HIV positive. You will want to have the three month test to be sure, but in the UK the six month test would be very cautious. Nearly everyone will show positive by three months if they are really infected. If your partner was recently infected when you both had your first tests together, he may have been in this three month window period. Other possibilities are that the initial test was wrong – this is least likely – or that he had a more recent risk.
Hi good morning, my partner and I have been together for 1 year and a half, when we first started daiting and decided to have sex , we went I gor tested and both results were negative, we have been having unprotected sex all this time,he got tested again for HIV on dec 16th of 2011, and his results came back positive, we received the results on jan 2nd of 2012, and I got tested that day and my results came back negative, we kept having unprotected sex during that period from the 12-16-11 to 01-02-2012, because we did not know, how can this happen, what are my chances of getting it, i am scared, cant stop thinking about this, I need some advice. I know I have to get tested again in 3 months, and then at the 6 months, please