Question
What is the chance?
16 September 2008. Related: All topics, HIV testing, HIV transmission.
I had unprotected sex (vaginal and oral) with another married person, a female (I’m a male), during the first week in August, 2008. We also open mouthed kiss.
She has been married and/or with only her husband for about 16-17 years. He had a history of cheating on her in the past. According to her, he hadn’t cheated on her in 5 years, but they still are sexually active with one another even though their marriage is a struggle. He supposedly used protection with his old ‘past girlfriends’.
After we had sex (it was only this one time), I have been in a major panic brought on by guilt/medical concerns. I felt like and still do that I’m ‘infested’. I explained to my mistress my concerns so she went out to get an HIV test and the results came back negative. I also got tested during the 3rd week in August (at a small clinic) for HIV and during the 4th week at a doctor’s office for a complete STD/HIV check up. Everything at both places came back negative.
I have been with and only with my wife for 14 years. We have been HIV-negative. Because of my guilt and concerns, I admitted to my wife about the affair. Before I admitted to my wife she did give me oral about a week after my possible exposure, but I didn’t ejaculate in her mouth (I don’t know if she swallowed my pre-cum). I also gave her oral twice. There has been no penis to vagina contact with my wife and I. Since I admitted to her of the affair we haven’t had any sex whatsoever.
My mistress, who isn’t my mistress any longer, and I are reasonably healthy adults. She is in fact a little on the heavy side. She told me she never had any symptoms related to any STDs and/or HIV. And neither have I. Looking back, I just don’t trust her husband. Suppose he had sex with someone within the last five years and that person was infected. Once again, my mistress tested negative.
What are the numerical statistics/chances of her husband having passed HIV to her and then her to me and then me to my wife.
Answer
i-Base doesn’t answer individual questions about transmission. There is more information on testing and modes of transmission here.