Q and A

Question

Are there websites to meet other HIV positive people?

I am an HIV positive heterosexual British woman. I had chosen the single life since my diagnosis five years ago. But now I feel ready to start dating again and would love to find a partner that I can maybe share a future with. I refuse to sit on the shelf anymore and give in to a solitary future because of my HIV!

Unfortunately, I have not had very good reactions when I have disclosed my HIV status and have been the victim of ignorant gossip as a result. So I was wondering, are there any free dating sites for people living with HIV in the UK?

Answer

It is good that you want to start dating again. The shock from an HIV diagnosis often makes people want to wait before dating again. Sometimes it takes time to build up the strength and confidence to want to do this.

Deciding to meet other positive people has a lot of advantages and one of the easiest ways to make contact with people is to use the internet.

The community forums at poz.com include a personals section that has free registration and many thousands of international users (including from the UK). This might be a good place to start.

You do not have to live alone just because of your HIV status. There are many people in a similar situation just like you, but they have managed to find someone that they can share and enjoy their lives with. This is a very encouraging and a positive step that you have made towards your future.

Community-based sites are likely to be better that commercial sites that require fees. Most community sites though include options to access more feature by subscribing.

If the forums here are not helpful, you could start a discussion to see whether other members have found other sites helpful.

There are lots of online resources about internet dating that talk about how to do this safely. This includes taking care when giving out personal information and if you get to the point of wanting to meet, to do this in a public place, with a friend knowing your plans.

The check list at this link is a good overview if you are new to meeting people by internet.

140 comments

  1. Anonymous

    Guys may please remain anonymous, what are the chances of transmitting hiv to my partner who doesn’t know her status. We have been together for 3 years, having sex without a condom

  2. Simon Collins

    Hi Grace, I am sorry that i-Base don’t run a contact service. Please try i-Base organisations that are closer to you. Good luck with finding a partner.

  3. Grace

    Hello friends,

    Am looking for an hiv positive partner.

    Am a woman age 40 living in Tanzania and after a long time of living single I feel am ready for dating and marriage. I have a son and would prefer to find a man above my age who only requires a true love/life companion.

  4. Simon Collins

    Hi Lizzy, thanks, lots of people like partners who are also positive. I am sorry that i-Base doesn’t run a connection service. Maybe see if there are HIV support groups where you live. Some people also find it easier to use dating apps where your profile can include your HIV status. Good luck with your plans.

  5. Lizzy

    Am having positive am a lady my name lizzy I need a date someone serious that we can make family and grow old together.

  6. Lisa Thorley

    Hi Emily,

    In most countries there are support groups for people living with HIV, which country do you live in?

  7. Emily

    I have hiv and I need to know friends

  8. Roy Trevelion

    Hi Olinda,

    It’s great that you started HIV treatment (ART) in 2010.

    But I’m sorry to hear about the changes in your shape. The meds used in modern ART are not linked to these kinds of fat loss and fat gain. Please see this guide to fat loss.

    So it’s a good idea to talk to your doctor about your HIV treatment.You can ask if other meds will be easier for you to take.

    Please also see this guide to a balanced diet and your health. There are many tips in this to help you maintain your weight.

  9. olinda

    How are you,I started my treatment 2010 then later I lost my hips, my bums
    ,my face is no longer round,and I.have broad shoulders big stomach.I eat we.I am not sick but shapeless I can’t fit my pants,skirts,dresses because of broad shoulders,no hips no bums.I need help to have my bums,hips,face back.

  10. Roy Trevelion

    Hi Pearl,

    The best of luck to you. Please try the links on this Q&A. Please have a look at the check list link if you are new to meeting people online.

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