Q and A

Question

How can my partner test HIV positive and I test HIV negative?

I went to test HIV with my partner.

I found out that she is positive and I was negative. After six months i went back I tested negative.

Please help as I don’t understand.

Answer

Thanks for your question as your situation is very common.

Has your partner’s  positive HIV test been checked by a second test in a lab. All rapid tests, need a positive result to be confirmed. This is because of the small chance of a false-positive result.

If the second test (called “western blot”) is positive then your partner is definitely positive. In this case, how is your partner doing and does she have support?

Even if your partner is HIV positive, it is common for one person in a couple to test positive and the other negative. This can happen even if they have bot been using condoms. This is mostly just luck. Over time, most people will catch HIV if they continue to have sex without a condom.

Even though you have not caught HIV so far, you can still catch HIV in the future. Genetics may explain some cases of protection, but most are just down to luck and chance.

Now you know your partners HIV status, you can still stay together and have sex safely. Condoms or PrEP are both really effective at stopping HIV and not sharing needles.

Also, after your partner gets an undetectable viral load on treatment, the risk drops to zero – even without condoms. The PARTNER study reported no transmission with an undetectable viral load. this was after about 900 couple had sex 58,000 without condoms (over several years).

Note: This answer was updated in January 2018 and October 2014 from a question from June 2011. i-Base no longer answers individual questions about HIV transmission and risk. (See: Question 1, 5, 6 and 9 at this link).

335 comments

  1. Lisa Thorley

    Hi Ohe,

    If you’ve tested negative and not been at risk since, then no. Also its highly unlikely that you’d contract HIV through one such encounter.

  2. ohe

    I had unprotected sex which last 25 seconds, with a HIV positive person, march 2016 I tested negative , can be positive as in future?

  3. Lisa Thorley

    Hi boitumelo.

    Even if your partner is not on treatment, it can still be hard to get HIV. However, the risks are much higher then if he were on treatment. If a person is on treatment, and has an undetectable viral load the risk are close to zero. If you want to reduce risk, the only way is to use a condom. For more on testing please see:
    http://i-base.info/qa/11844

  4. boitumelo

    Am a 28 year lady am dating a from June till nw. I found out he’s hiv positive and he’s not taking treatment. And I went to test I found out dat am negative I tested on October and nw November. Am strss and scared dat I may hv it.

  5. Simon Collins

    Hi Thabo, your experience is very common. The second hospital is just being cautious if they are saying you need to test again in a few months. It is still very likely you do not have HIV. Please see Question 5 at this link for more info:
    http://i-base.info/qa/what-are-the-most-asked-questions

  6. Thabo

    Hy guys just tested negetive nw my wife positive and she is pregnant. my doctor said its psble for this to happen. we went to other private hsptal they say i might have it in futere. so I am confused now on what to do.

  7. Simon Collins

    Hi Linky, please see question 5 at this link and come back if you still have questions:
    http://i-base.info/qa/what-are-the-most-asked-questions

  8. Linky

    I had unprotected sex with my girlfriend, and she’s positive, I also went for laboratory test been negative… how’s is it possible, coz again she’s 4month’s pregnant

  9. Simon Collins

    Hi Kiwee, how is your partner coping with his diagnosis. It must be very difficult for him. It is good that you both know your status so that you can be careful in the future. This means using condoms until he is on treatment with an undetectable viral load. HIV is not transmitted by your partner giving you oral sex. It doesn’t happen.
    This link might alos be of interest:
    http://i-base.info/qa-on-the-partner-study

  10. Kiwee

    My partner tested positive March of this year. Hid it from me until I found out in October of this year. Was not getting any treatment. We have always used condoms. When I took the test I was negative. Can I be affected, by him doing oral sex on me. That’s the only thing was unprotected. Sorry so into detail. I just want to know. Thanks. Please help.