Question

My partner wants to stop PrEP.

18 December 2021. Related: All topics, CD4 and viral load, HIV transmission, PrEP, Sero different couples.

My partner wants to discontinue taking PrEP. He says he’s not up for taking these pills. Although I’m undetectable and we use condoms, I feel uncomfortable with his decision. We spoke about it and the risks involved, but he still want to stop. This is making me very anxious.

Answer

Answer: Josh Peasegood

Hi, how are you?

It sounds that your partner is making an informed decision. I understand that you feel uncomfortable but if he is aware of the risks and does not want to take PrEP you need to respect their decision.

That being said, being uncomfortable you should not feel you have to have sex with your partner. Your parter should also respect why you are feeling uncomfortable.

You are undetectable and you use condoms. There is no risk of your partner getting HIV. U=U means that if you are undetectable, HIV is untransmissable. Keeping up with your medication will keep your undetectable status.

As is often the case, your partners decision is not fair: HIV positive people often take the lead role in looking after their partner’s health. Sometimes PrEP works the other way though and negative partners feel they are sharing part of the experience of their positive partner.

Although each person should be responsible for their own health care, by using condoms you are both already doing this.

If you have another question, send it in.

Josh.