Question
Why am I HIV negative if my boyfriend is HIV positive?
29 January 2018. Related: All topics, HIV transmission, Sero different couples.
My partner and I recently went for an HIV test and my results came negative while his came positive. This is very strange because in the 2 years that we have been together, we hardly ever use a condom?
How does this come about? are there other cases like mine? is this possible?
Answer
Hi, how are you doing? and how is your partner?
Your situation is very common and you have just been lucky. The risk of catching HIV is usually quite low, even if you don’t always use condoms. It also related to many things, including your partners viral load (ie how infections he or she is).
The risk is highest in the first few months after infection (1 in 10 or higher). After the first year when viral load is lower, this might only be 1 in 500.
Depending on the type of sex you have, and how often, with these number you see how it could just be luck. You could still catch HIV the next time you are at risk. You should also have another HIV test in 3 months, to check that you were not infected in the few months prior to your original test.
A small percentage of people (less than 1% in the UK), have genetic protection against HIV infection. There are no commercial tests that are able to check this.
While many people think (or hope) they have this protection, and that they will be lucky and not catch HIV if they don’t use a condom, in reality they are usually wrong. This is why numbers of new infections are still increasing each year.
Your partners diagnosis sounds like it was a shock for both of you. Take time to find good resources and support, both for your partner and yourself while you come to terms with what has happened. This affects people in all sorts of ways, but with good treatment and care, your partner can expect to lead a long life.
Also, once your partner has undetectable viral load in ART, they are no longer able to transmit HIV.
For more information on monitoring and treatment see the i-Base Introduction to ART. Please also tell your partner that i-Base run a free treatment phoneline if he would like to talk directly about his care.
This answer was updated in January 2018 from a question posted in October 2007.
I’m sorry but i-Base no longer answers individual questions about risks of HIV transmission or HIV testing.
This service is based on information relating to treatment of people who are HIV positive.
Information online
Most testing questions are already answered on the FAQ page:
http://i-base.info/qa/faq/hiv-transmission-and-testing
Our guide to HIV Testing and risks of sexual transmission guide has more detailed and easy to read information about these topics. It can be read online at this link:
http://i-base.info/guides/testing
Worried about HIV?
If you are worried about a possible infection contact your local testing centre.
In the UK you can find your nearest clinic using the NHS website:
http://www.nhs.uk/ServiceDirectories/Pages/ServiceSearchAdditional.aspx?ServiceType=SexualHealthService
Understanding HIV test results:
If you do not understand results from an HIV test, please contact the centre where you were tested.
Worried about symptoms?
If you are concerned about any symptoms please contact a doctor.
I’m sorry to hear about your ordeal but it is very unlikely that you would catch HIV form the circumstances you describe.
I
Hello sir
I had unprotect sex 3week ago when can some one go for the HIV test and ist possible to contact HIV without ejaculation waiting for your respond
I waz kidnad en raped in 2006 but tested negaive after en tested again 2009 to be sure en stil negative but in 2011 my sister got sick en had sum wounds in her head en askd me to sqeez the puss in her wounds en I did en remamber I an open wound in finger Im not sure if I cam it contact wth her fluid wth my wound or wat der waz no blood…so my qxn is can I get infected by being in contact wth her puss?coz a month later sh told me dat shez HIV positive en has bin cnc 2008
Hello David,
I’m sorry to hear about your partner’s recent diagnosis. ELISA tests for antigens and antibodies related to the HIV virus. CMV cannot produce a false positive test result. The Western Blot test is used to confirm these results and will provide a conclusive result. Please follow this link for more information about types of HIV test.
I’m sorry but i-Base no longer answers individual questions about risks of HIV transmission or HIV testing.
This service is based on information relating to treatment of people who are HIV positive.
Information online
Most testing questions are already answered on the FAQ page:
http://i-base.info/qa/faq/hiv-transmission-and-testing
Our guide to HIV Testing and risks of sexual transmission guide has more detailed and easy to read information about these topics. It can be read online at this link:
http://i-base.info/guides/testing
Worried about HIV?
If you are worried about a possible infection contact your local testing centre.
In the UK you can find your nearest clinic using the NHS website:
http://www.nhs.uk/ServiceDirectories/Pages/ServiceSearchAdditional.aspx?ServiceType=SexualHealthService
Understanding HIV test results:
If you do not understand results from an HIV test, please contact the centre where you were tested.
Worried about symptoms?
If you are concerned about any symptoms please contact a doctor.
Hi,
I had unprotected sex with a guy 3 weeks ago, he didn’t ejaculate and assures me that he has never bottomed before! I have been sick once this week and my throat has been sore for a couple of days and i have some muscle fatigue!
What are the chances of HIV? It’s panicking me!
thanks.
Hi Mellisa,
I am very sorry to hear about your situation. I understand that this has been stressful for you and that you are feeling confused. Can I ask if your partner is currently on treatment for HIV? If he is on treatment this will reduce the possibility of him infecting you. If your test result was negative this means you may have been lucky until now. You will need to confirm this result after three months (without unprotected sex in between) to rule out the window period.
It is normal to be upset that your partner hasn’t told you about his HIV until now. It is important to talk about this with him to find out why he didn’t tell you before now. Sometimes people find it very difficult to tell their partners that they have HIV. This may be because they are afraid of rejection or stigma. It is up to you and your partner to decide how to deal with this.
Please follow this link for more questions about couples where one person is positive and the other is negative.
Hi, My life-partner just came up HIV positive for 2 ELISA (10 day now) and now they are waiting for a WB confirmation (this week should be available). He is sick and looks (by doctors) he is infected with CMV. No CMV test are ready yet (12 days now) and I was wondering, beyong I assume he is HIV +, could be possible for a person to come up HIV + because of CMV infection? (very unlikely told by doctors) and It is possible we should be tested again before he starts any treatment? (I’m doing it tomorrow). I concern about having an HIV + because of CMV and he starts treatment and then it is going to take longer to find out if he is really infected for hiv. I was told some people come up hiv + because of other infections (CMV, Tuberculosis, etc). The PCR test is underway, also worry, since there is an infection already, something could be misundestood. . As you see, I’m not to worry for a HIV + result (for myself either), as today quality of life is incrising in every sector (desease control), but I’m very concern that another illnes could take advantage of doctors betting for hiv when could be just high levels of everything that co-react as hiv + when is not at all. Thanks!, have a great day!.
Hi Ani,
I’m very sorry to hear about your recent diagnosis. It is possible that when you were tested in December you had been recently infected and were still in the window period.
How old is your baby? Newborn babies of HIV positive women will always test positive to begin with. This is because they still have their mother’s antibodies. It’s important to re-test your baby at six weeks, 3 months, and 18 months, to be sure of their status. If possible you should also avoid breastfeeding your baby until you are sure of their HIV status. You can read about the risks of breastfeeding in our pregnancy guide.