Q and A

Question

I tested HIV positive and my boyfriend’s result was negative. Is this possible?

8 December 2011. Related: All topics, HIV transmission, Newly diagnosed, Sero different couples.

I just found out that I am HIV positive.

My question is, being that my boyfriend cheats all the time, is it possible for him to test negative, and I positive?

Is it possible he gave it to me?

Answer

Answer: Angelina Namiba

Thank you for your question.

I am sorry to hear about your diagnosis. I hope you have support in terms of dealing with and coming to terms with your diagnosis. Please follow this link to i-Base Q&A and this link to poz.com in the US that has good forums for information/questions about other people who are recently diagnosed.

It is possible for your boyfriend to test negative. This is because there are many couples who are in the same situation as you are. Where one partner tests HIV positive and the other tests negative, even though they have had sex without a condom over the years. This is because it is not every time that a negative person has unprotected sex with a positive person that they get infected. If your boyfriend really tested HIV negative, then he would not have infected you. It is possible therefore that you could have been infected before you met him.

Having said that though, and without knowing the full circumstances regarding your boyfriend’s test, it is difficult to comment on that. This is something you might find more useful discussing on a one to one, with a health adviser/counsellor.

16 comments

  1. Roy Trevelion •

    Hi, I’m sorry to hear about your diagnosis. But it’s important if you’ve tested positive to talk to your clinic about your health and about going on HIV treatment.

    You can also talk to your doctor about how you feel about starting treatment, and what drugs would be best for you as an individual.

    You can find out more about starting treatment here:
    http://i-base.info/guides/starting

  2. lungah •

    My two boy friends tested negative but I tested positive and I had unprotected sex with them. I am wondering where I got it from because I only slept with them only my whole life.

  3. Robin Jakob •

    I’m sorry to hear about your diagnosis.

    It is common for one partner in a relationship to test positive and the other to test negative. This is because HIV is not transmitted every time someone has sex without a condom. This can be the case for years sometimes. However over time most people will eventually become positive if they are having sex without a condom with someone who is HIV positive.

    You can find more information about being newly diagnosed here:
    http://i-base.info/if-you-have-just-found-out-you-are-hiv-positive/

    And more information about HIV transmission here:
    http://i-base.info/guides/testing/risk-hiv-status

  4. Sandy •

    I have just found out that I am positive, How I found out was through an application for life insurance. My boyfriend tested negative and we have been having unprotected sex for years. How is that possible? I have not gone for a confirmation test, I only heard from the insurance company that they cant give me life insurance.

  5. Simon Collins •

    Thanks Lia. Talk to your doctor if you decide to have children as you may be able to use HIV meds a bit earlier to reduce the risk to you partner when you conceive.

  6. lia •

    Guys I have experienced the same the same thing my boyfriend is negative and I’m positive. Its best to go 2 the doctor the two of you and u can get help. My boyfriend loves me as I am and I am greatful for that and I love him too. I have not yet started treatment because my cd4+ is still 589 so I might start treatment after two years. If I excersise, avoid alcohol and drugs, the doctor says we can still make children.

  7. Simon Collins •

    Please see this section of the new i-Base guide to HIV testing and the risk of sexual transmission.

  8. joseph mukoro •

    sometime ago ,i was with my girl friend for rough two month, we both went for test and she was hiv positive why iam negative and we did unprotected sex ,pls wath is the reason behind difference in result

  9. Simon Collins •

    These are things you probably need to talk about with a health advisor who will have time to look at your previous risk history.

    This site is not the best place to speculate based on limited information.

  10. James •

    I was wondering the same thing. My boyfriend is also a cheater. Could it be that his HIV is undetected. He’s only gotten the oral swab but that isn’t the same as a blood test. I’ve been faithful he hasn’t,